Thursday, August 20, 2009

11 months

My computer situation is all screwed up today, so I can't post a picture. But yesterday marked C.'s 11th month. I am so torn about how I feel about my little boy growing up. It's so fun to watch him as he cruises around, trying so hard to walk, holding his chubby hands up because he wants to be held ALL THE TIME. His cute little cuddles, his horrible sleep habits, his avid nursing. In short, he is a momma's boy through and through. So, he's still very much a baby, but in 30 days, he will suddenly become a toddler! What? It's been a year since I pushed 9 lbs 12 ounces into this world in 20 minutes? Seems impossible. And I'm sad, in a lot of ways. Because some of these milestones will be the last time I watch one of my own children learn to ...
Pending any accidents or acts of God, we are not planning on having any more children. Most of the time, I am okay with this. While I loved being pregnant, and call me crazy, even giving birth, I think that it's just right for our family just to have two children. Sometimes I'm bummed that N. will not have a sister and will not have a relationship like I do with a sister, but I know lots of women who only had brothers and they seem okay. But then every once in a while I look at C. and how giant he is (around 30 lbs) and realize I will never hold my own little baby curled to my chest again. I'll never see my own child learn to crawl. I'll never get to see that funny face when you feed them something new. So, I'm delighting in all of his new skills, but there is a hint of sadness that did not accompany them when N. was learning. Sigh, such is life. Now, I must get to work on planning a birthday party. Not my forte!

5 Comments:

Blogger Kerri Smith said...

He's that old already? Wow! That really flew by!

3:31 PM  
Blogger stella g. said...

i didn't have a sister and i made out ok. :) i wish we lived closer bc i'd let you hold this little guy - especially when he's fussy! i can't imagine him turning 1, though. that must seem crazy.

3:59 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

Crazy! I know! Karen, I wish we were all closer! I would love to hold your wee one for a while. Try to take in every minute, because while the days (and nights) sometimes feel long, the years are very fast.

9:05 AM  
Blogger Cindy said...

What a beautiful note Erin. Thank you so much for reminding us of the little joys in life. I thought my 9lb. 4 oz. fella who is going to 2 in September and weighs 28 pounds was a football player but you guys win in that category! I too am not planning any more children of my own, we may adopt foreign little ones who knows. But no more nursing for me and no more pregnancy. I didn't do to well with any of those things but the little baby face that looks up at your adoringly as if you could never do anything wrong and the love that pours forth from them even at 4 a.m. when you think if you don't sleep you will die is a part of the life that you miss. Well here's to hoping you have a fabulous birthday Caleb! Love you Erin for always being so honest, and reminding me of the little things that are so beautiful!

7:07 AM  
Blogger Colleen said...

:) Seattle Real Estate

1:01 AM  

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