Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Back in the saddle

Well, today was my first day back to work. And, it's okay. I wasn't sure how I would feel about it. It was definitely more traumatic with N. She was my first baby and I was so convinced that we would both die if I worked. Obviously, we have both survived. Thankfully, this time I am in the office only three days a week, as well, so that helps a lot. While I certainly miss C. and loathe the 3 times per day pumping sessions, this works for me. It is such a controversial subject it seems. Believe me, I get the guilt trips from my mom regularly. I definitely understand the desire to stay home. Regardless of the money situation, though, I'm not sure I would be happy as a 100% SAHM. I just don't know that I can be that selfless. To be all about the kids all the time. I feel as if I could be stumbling into dangerous territory, and while not too many people read this, I don't want to write anything that can be misconstrued, so I'll leave it at this: I work in an office part time. It works for me. I understand those who do not. It works for them. There, is that pacifist enough? :)

6 Comments:

Blogger stella g. said...

more than diplomatic. i'm sometimes scared of being home with kids all day, too. whenever i see moms with multiple kids between the ages of 1 and 5 i get nervous inside, like someday that might be me. you're doing a great job. no guilt trips here!

3:41 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

As long as you and the kids are happy - that's really what's important. I remember a time (like you said) when you so longed to be at home - but now you've found a balance that works for you and your family. I see no reason for guilt unless you or the kids were really struggling. It seems to me like you've got a good situation going on!

6:33 AM  
Blogger Erin said...

Thanks for the support, ladies. Sometimes i feel the Christian community demonizes working for women. Sometimes i am ridiculously guarded about what i say b/c there's such a stigma.

1:16 PM  
Blogger stella g. said...

it's your blog. say what you want!

4:29 PM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

I am a mom to two little ones....and I work full time in an office.

Sometimes it seems like it is not worth and I hope to be part-time soon, but I know myself and know that being a full time SAHM would not work for me.

Don't be so hard on yourself. It sounds like you are doing the right thing. And if someone thought you were doing the "wrong" thing...well...you don't answer to them.

(Found you through Megan's blog and I just had to comment on this one...)

8:17 AM  
Blogger LifeAtTheCircus.com said...

I feel the need to comment as well... stumbled across you via Sharing Christmas...I am a SAHM and I've noticed the stigma that many working moms feel and I just wanted to say that I don't think it is right. My mom worked my whole life and I thought she was the best mom ever. She was my best friend growing up and I never felt slighted b/c she worked. True, I stay at home now and it works for me, I love it, but it def doesn't make me any better of a mom. And I think the balancing job you working moms do is incredible and admirable!

10:42 AM  

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